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(2 Squirts | Show Concern) [03 May 2006|12:42am] no one cares enough to listen... it sucks

(1 Squirt | Show Concern) well wow [01 May 2006|12:01am] Summer is here things are different. im sitting alone in my apartment wondering what am i doing wiht my life? you know when your life is so busy and crazy and then there is a week break in all of the chaos and you feel ...blank. my summer will be busy... my year was very busy. i have nothing to do for a week and i want to take a vacation. ive been really sick for the past 5days and im starting to feel better but the cough is getting worse. ive been sleeping a lot. it's been helping.. i sleep wake up eat.. take a nap... go for a walk and then sleep agian. I just saw a "friends with money" at the movies.. amazing. subtle. beautifully written and executed. i recomend it. whatever... i feel weird. down. i think im going to watch zoolander before bed. i dont know. it's been so long since ive updated whatever.

(2 Squirts | Show Concern) [28 Oct 2005|10:40pm] ok so here is a post i thought i already posted but i guess not. pictures from our show... it was alright. glad it's over but hey some of the costumes were fun ( masterandmargarita )

(1 Squirt | Show Concern) for franchesca [27 Sep 2005|11:14pm] i was tagged by chesca420 Say 20 random facts about yourself, then you must tag three people and they do the same! first of all, i never do these things, and i've been seriously thinking about my facts all day long...i'm sorry if they arn't very interesting or funny ty, but i'll give it a shot! 1. i have a stiff neck 2. i just took a perkaset 3.i have two dogs named Pacino and Louie 4. i have a 3rd nipple... its really tiny and it never grew. 5. i slept in my moms bed till i was in 9th grade... no joke 6. i once got hypnotized at the fair. i have a video tape. 7. 7 is my all time lucky #... well 1 - 10. 8. my dad was in prison from when i was 3 to 17. 9. im passive agressive. 10. i used to take all the red, pink and orange starburst out of the pack, open them all up and then squish them all into one giant starburst pancake. 11. im gay. 12. i could eat pizza for every meal probably for atleast a year and probably not be sick of it. 13. i act out senarios outloud... like fake "what if" confrintational conversations. 14. hot dogs freak me out... i can only eat them if they are cut up with a side of ketchup like when i was five years old. 15. im full. 16. ive been to 5 other countries 17. i really want to see proof!. 18. i secretly hate waffles. 19.i am so busy but i dont do my work. 20. when i graduate i should be about $22,000 in debt... roughly. i tag: girlinlondon annonomous divatina

(2 Squirts | Show Concern) crazy sober [04 Sep 2005|02:19am] [ mood | crazy ] i have not been in anymood to update. blah blah blah school stress no time party on sunday... i need a costume theme- jungle... any ideas? broke! money on the way fuck bush the news makes me cry i feel so awful i want to just stop doing things... like going to school or doing laundry... eating. i just feel bad doing these things while this shit is going on in the world. i feel so helpless. ps fran if i win the raffle im donating the money to redcross it's 2:22 i made a wish probably wont come tru im tired... but yet i want to wake up early and do things with my day tom.... thrifting in west palm... i seem to find better stuff there family time erin time driving back to miami for party time school is stressful but grand im having fun i have to pee livejournal has a gift shop?!?!? katie has two cats... i surprisingly like them, until their little nubbay paws start clawing to get into my room. then i want to feed them to the racoon that lives in the bush outside my window. i think ill name him Guss i must urinate fran im excited for tomorrow... lets get wasted and throw up then drink some more... cam whore party of two, franchesca and dominic your table is ready! ok night

(3 Squirts | Show Concern) a year in some what of a review [03 Sep 2005|10:26pm] ( my favorites from the year )

(3 Squirts | Show Concern) [01 Jul 2005|12:20pm] Fran is fantastic ( photoshoot with fran )

(1 Squirt | Show Concern) [23 Jun 2005|09:13am] [ mood | curious ] Do you ever wait to check all your voicmail till late at night when you are drunk, and then forget the next day who had called and what their message said? I do this all the time.

(4 Squirts | Show Concern) too much to drink? NEVER :) [19 Jun 2005|09:57am] [ mood | crazy ] When should the party end? That is a full beer and it appears that i just passed out right there in the middle of the party! IT IS THE START OF MY BIRTHDAY WEEK!!! 21 BABY 21 The festivities start tonight and last till next weekend!

(8 Squirts | Show Concern) [11 Jun 2005|08:15pm] [ mood | okay ] I am trying to change my life for the better this is become a very difficult task. My emotions hinder my ability to make decicions that should benifit my life. I have become an emotional person. i used to worry about not being emotional at all. I am glad now that i can be emotionally vonerable but i have realized that these feeling,... i don't like. Im realizing that i dont have many real friends. i feel like i am just in people lives to help them or make them feel better about themselves. THis is also crazy to me because i have so many "friends" in my life. the number is way to high, and when i realize this i question what i am doing wrong. there are over 100 contacts in my cell phone and i dont think ive really had a heart to heart with more then 1 or 2 in the past few months. People dont care yet they do. And whats funny is people pretend to care when you talk to them but really i dont think they are always listening. i mean if they were wouldnt they do something more to help you as your friend fix or understand the situation? i just hate realizing im alone in my life. I hate being an adult, ugh take me back to the fucking 2nd grade! And ya i have my flaws and things about myself i dont like but i mean come one whats going on... why dont i have someone to love me at the end of the day? and someone who i am able to love back as well.? Ive become kinda negitive and i hate that... i cant remeber a time when i was ever this negitive. I want to enjoy just the little things.. but lately there has been nothing little... everything has been over dramatic and way too much. AND PEOPLE ARE FUCKED UP and i miss my friends from high school. and there around but not... and i want to find friends like them. Not even "like" them, but i want the safety i felt when we were all together. In miami when i am at a party or a gathering.. i do not feel safe and comfortable around all of those people. People who judge all the time. and we all judge.. it just what we do, we have opinions therefor we judge. but now i find people are judging in nasty way. sometimes or most they dont even realize it. im starting to live my life for me. and i dont want to hurt anyone in the process i just dont want to care about it anymore. on a lighter note i got a good job what to do what to do?

(4 Squirts | Show Concern) [06 Jun 2005|03:00pm] [ mood | horny ] as im back in miami life is not quite how i would like it. im on a hunt for a job im trying to figure out school, finacal aid, loans, grants, friend, and a new living situation. im living in the ghetto in a nice apt. that has bad memories and a bad energy. moving to south beach hopefully by july 1st. Another $1500 i have to raise for first last and security. grrrrrr. im turning 21 in like 13 days. i have no plans and my parents payed my rent for june so i told them it was ok if that was my bday present. which sucks but is fine. and it's shitty because for the first time in my life i have things in mind i would like for my birthday. and im not even talking about an ipod because im so over not having one and i know they wouldnt have got me one either way... all im saying is as soon as my student loan comes in the fall im putting money away for an ipod, a degital camera, $ for kate old computer. (which i hope to buy sooner) and stuff for my new apt... and hopefully i have enough money to cover my rent for the whole semester. i need to win the lottery. im getting over strep throat.. im on amoxicilian. i feel so much better already... i cant drink for another 7 days which is cool.. im kind of enjoying it. i just really enjoy a glass of wine with dinner and then three more after. :) i am seeing the changes in myself. i have changed a lot in the last 3 years. im so excited yet so scared of getting older. my life is regaining some form of stucture that i like and need. as soon as i get a dig im going to update pics... my hair is kinda real long but not as long as i would like i hope all is well with everyone who actually takes time to read my entries. xo love you

(Show Concern) [02 Jun 2005|04:09pm] things are getting better

(2 Squirts | Show Concern) [31 May 2005|06:44pm] i have never hated one person so much in my whole life. it's giving me nightmares

(3 Squirts | Show Concern) [31 May 2005|02:00am] i just don't know i want to be happy i want to be love and i want to love.. and i have it but im fucking crazy i feel like im not a good enough human being i feel uncomfortable and unloved i am crazy u never know what you have until you lose it losing it sucks over thinking can kill ur day or consume it i just don't know i cry too much i cry too much in the last few days im not a crying type of guy i think i do it like once a year maybe twice i dont know where im going with this entry ugh!!!! fucking ugh! im gettign settled but have never felt so unsettled in my life i just don't know what to do

(Show Concern) [24 May 2005|09:28pm] ( an entry )

(2 Squirts | Show Concern) random [23 May 2005|05:10pm] moving is a bitch! it is somwthing i seem to be doing way to much... but i have like the best roomate ever.. it's perfect i have so much to do, and i dont know where to begin. i feel like miami is an evil city.. i get bad vibes when im here. i think i need to move to the beach.. the ocean might calm me so close would be good. i need a job! i need to cut the people that bring me down out of my life.

(Show Concern) [20 May 2005|05:22pm] [ mood | weird ] and life begins once again in a another place. im not happy today i dont know why. i just killed the biggest spider ive ever seen in my house! i hate those suckers! anyway i have a lot to do and i dont know where to start. it's a new dawn it's a new day it's a new life, for me and im feeling good

(2 Squirts | Show Concern) [18 May 2005|10:27am] my last day in nyc! i spent it with my loviee got drunk in th city happy hour is so great! got a new tie! and some sun glasses hung out in the park hit up a few bars for happy hour fell in love with the city all over again then got drunk some more with sal as well and we went out for a last hoorah leaving today ill be back in fla by 3pm weird! ( nyc )

(3 Squirts | Show Concern) [17 May 2005|01:55pm] i went to california and it was so fucking beautiful! mountains, ocean, desert, snow, and warmth all in one state. i think one day i might have to move there. not only is it like 75 deg. all year round, but there is just famous people walking around everywhere! i saw someone famous like everyday. i felt like everyone there was a god damn actor though... but i guess it is kinda the same way in nyc. oh and i think it is required to have a personal trainer to live in the state because everyones body is sick! i couldnt even believe it. i wanted to stop eating all together. anyway i suggest that if anyone has the opp to go to cali. totally do it. it's beautiful!

(2 Squirts | Show Concern) [06 May 2005|11:41am] I felt like a rockstar last night. my friend aiko through a party for her boyfriend machi in the penthouse suit of this great hotel in manhattan. huge! balcones that wrapped around the whole hotel room. so much liquor. free liquor. we started drinking at 5 and decided to leave the room to go out to a club in the city. which we didnt have to pay for or pay for a sgle drink there because of the conections machi has. We went to club BED and it was so amazing. there are just beds everywhere and they are like sectioned off so u have ur own party on a bed and there are private parties happening on all the beds around u. it was great! i felt famous..

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